Hard Times...Good Times pt II

The LA Times has a story about Children moving back in with their parents due to the Mortgage Collapse, on the whole, it's a fair story but perhaps overlooks just how common it was in American to have three generations under one roof.:

"...When adult children and parents are forced to live together, they typically experience a breakdown in what Coontz calls "the economy of gratitude." Family members notice only the inconveniences and ignore the nice things that they do for one another.

That doesn't have to happen, of course. Houses are larger now, so family members have more space and more chances for privacy. But beyond that, children and parents can peacefully coexist by approaching the new living arrangement as they would if they were taking on any roommate: Agree in advance on how to handle household purchases, cleaning and other responsibilities. Resolve the question of who is in charge and how the house is to be governed, and the situation may not seem so bad after all."

Now this is a somewhat fact of life, however Common Sense tells me that our lifestyle in the US, extreme self containment, is probably even less healthy, there is no need to learn Coping Skills like Patience and Tolerance of other's foibles.

The story does go on to point out this benefit:

"Hinkle had to think twice about living under the same roof as the son who had been her most problematic child.

"It's been surprisingly wonderful," she says. "He's calm and sensible, and I'm getting a level of contact with my kids and grandkids that has been more rewarding than I could ever have dreamed. Neither of us could have afforded to live here on our own."

Hinkle and her son talked about how they would divide the space and respect each other's privacy. She lives in the former garage, converted into a studio with its own entrance, and the kitchen is shared. When her door is closed, that means she's not to be bothered. No one is to assume that she will be the live-in babysitter.

For her part, Hinkle goes into other parts of the house only when invited.

"If it is getting tense, then I go into my room and close the door and work on e-mails or read," she says. "I know basically they are very good parents, and I made plenty of mistakes. They will make their own mistakes."

Now this in my view will be the "new" normal in the US for a couple of years, as the Economy rolls up tighter and tighter, people will retreat into what Institutions that remain, in this case, the Family, in times past, when one family member with a family of their own went through a Divorce or prolonged Unemployment/underemployment, the Family normally the Parents would offer to put them up "until they get back on their feet". Only in this case, I think we will see the rebirth of closer Family Unit that pools efforts to try and get ahead. There will be adult children who have to return to school to learn new skills, that will take time and humbleness to accomplish.